Dionysus- God of the Drink
Greek god of wine, wine making, grape harvest, ritual madness and ecstasy. He is one of the 12 Olympians and is the last god to be accepted into Mount Olympus. He had a mortal mother Semele who was impregnated by Zeus, and was also one of the “younger” gods. However in some other versions of his origin he is the son of Zeus and Persephone, making him a full god not merely a demi-god. He is also included as one of the “dying gods,” meaning one of the gods that could actually die and not return.
In his most accepted origin stories, when Hera learned of Zeus’ affair she disguised herself as a nurse to Semele. She then planted “seeds of doubt” in Semele’s mind to make her question if Zeus was really who he claimed to be. She demanded that Zeus show his true form to her, but Zeus begged her not to ask such knowing that showing her his true divine form would kill her. She persisted, he buckled and transformed to his full glory, killing her instantly. Zeus’ true form is said to be as a bolts of lighting, so Semele was killed his is divine blaze. Zeus saved the fetal Dionysus by sewing him into his thigh. When he grew into an infant and was ready to be borne, Zeus went to release him from his body on the island Ikaria. Dionysus , because of this, is considered to be a “twice born” god- he was born by Semele and Zeus. Dionysus the baby demi-god was given to Hermes whom then delivered him to King Athamas and Queen Ino, who were bade to raise the baby as a girl to hide him away from the furious Hera.
Dionysus was exceptionally attractive. A Homeric hymn claims that when he was once disguised as a mortal male sitting on by the sea, a group of Lydian sailors mistook him for a prince and attempted to kidnap him. No rope could bind the god and Dionysus turned into a lion and unleashed a vicious bear on board their ship, killing all who came into contact with him. Those who fled overboard were said to have been mercifully transformed into dolphins. Only one man survived, a man called Acoetes, who somehow recognized the god and tried to stop the incident from the start.
Dionysus’ symbols are the bull, serpent, ivy, and wine. Dionysus had two extreme natures to his personality, both of which connect to him to wine. He could shift from bringing bliss and relaxation to a transition of bitterness and fury. He is believed to exemplify how the proper use of wine can be positive or negative depending on how much one was to partake in.
In his most accepted origin stories, when Hera learned of Zeus’ affair she disguised herself as a nurse to Semele. She then planted “seeds of doubt” in Semele’s mind to make her question if Zeus was really who he claimed to be. She demanded that Zeus show his true form to her, but Zeus begged her not to ask such knowing that showing her his true divine form would kill her. She persisted, he buckled and transformed to his full glory, killing her instantly. Zeus’ true form is said to be as a bolts of lighting, so Semele was killed his is divine blaze. Zeus saved the fetal Dionysus by sewing him into his thigh. When he grew into an infant and was ready to be borne, Zeus went to release him from his body on the island Ikaria. Dionysus , because of this, is considered to be a “twice born” god- he was born by Semele and Zeus. Dionysus the baby demi-god was given to Hermes whom then delivered him to King Athamas and Queen Ino, who were bade to raise the baby as a girl to hide him away from the furious Hera.
Dionysus was exceptionally attractive. A Homeric hymn claims that when he was once disguised as a mortal male sitting on by the sea, a group of Lydian sailors mistook him for a prince and attempted to kidnap him. No rope could bind the god and Dionysus turned into a lion and unleashed a vicious bear on board their ship, killing all who came into contact with him. Those who fled overboard were said to have been mercifully transformed into dolphins. Only one man survived, a man called Acoetes, who somehow recognized the god and tried to stop the incident from the start.
Dionysus’ symbols are the bull, serpent, ivy, and wine. Dionysus had two extreme natures to his personality, both of which connect to him to wine. He could shift from bringing bliss and relaxation to a transition of bitterness and fury. He is believed to exemplify how the proper use of wine can be positive or negative depending on how much one was to partake in.
Zeus- Father of the World
Seriously though, if Zeus wore a condom Greek history would be a lot less interesting. Zeus was the father of the gods and men, god of thunder and sky. He
is the younger brother to Hades and Poseidon. He is the son of Cronus, king of the titans, who
swallowed all his children to keep them from rising up to overthrow him. Zeus was spared this fate by his mother when she handed over a rock wrapped in a blanket instead of her baby to Cronus. When Zeus grew to manhood he forced his
father to spit up all those he swallowed, rescuing all of his siblings and with them they defeated the Titans and took over the power of the world. He received the power of thunder and
lighting by the Cyclops. He divided the earth up with his brothers by drawing
lots: Zeus received the sky and air, Poseidon the waters, and Hades the
underworld. He wed Hera and had many children with her but was also continually
unfaithful and had many children with mortal women. Zeus has a great temper and
is easily angered and even though he has many bastard children stories often
show him attempting to protect them from his jealous wife and other enemies
shows that he can have his heart strings pulled.
Zeus, even more so than the other gods, is the
easiest to anger. He is the most violent to those he damns, even to his own
family. He hung Hera upside down from the stars for angering him and threw his
son Hephaestus from the top of mount Olympus just for being ugly. He and his
brother Hades are not above using trickery to get what they want.
Hades- Lord of the Dead
Greek god of the underworld. Eldest brother to Poseidon and Zeus, son of a great titan whom Zeus defeated. Even though he was the god of the dead, he is said to have been passive at most times unless souls were attempted to be stolen from him or people tried to double cross him. However, he did achieve his bride Persephone through manipulation and violent means. He abducted her and tricked her into staying with him as his bride of the underworld. He did this by having her eat from a pomegranate fruit, thus having her bound to the underworld for partaking of its food. Hades is shown to be both intelligent and aloof but not together stoic and totally cruel. When Orpheus visited him and Persephone and begged for his wife to be returned to the land of the living with him through his beautiful singing voice and music, Hades was moved to tears. However, he was not the type of god to just bend the rules. He gave Orpheus a test he ultimately failed. He ordered him to leave the Underworld with his wife, under the condition he was not to turn around to make sure she was following. Orpheus failed the test fair and square and Hades kept the soul of Eurydice. Hades is honorable, he will admit when he is defeated and is a gracious loser even though he has the capabilities like any god to damn and punish those who enrage him. Legend says that Hades is the Lord of the Dead but is not the one responsible for punishing the souls condemned to hell, but he is the judge and jury of those who are sent to him.
Persephone- Beautifully Deadly
Persephone was the daughter of Zeus and the goddess Demeter, the beautiful goddess of the harvest. Persephone herself is the goddess of vegetation, and her abduction by the god of the underworld Hades represents the changing of Spring to Winter in Greek mythology. Legend has it that Persephone was abducted from earth by Hades and taken to the underworld. Demeter wept and missed her daughter so much that the world went cold, and the harvest died and thus the world experienced winter. When the people began to go hungry from lack of food, Zeus ordered Hades to bring Persephone back. Hades had to give in, but tricked Persephone into eating pomegranate seeds, thus binding her to the underworld after eating its food. Thus an agreement was made that she would spend part of the year with her mother on earth and the other part with her husband in the underworld, thus the reason why the earth experiences winter, Demeter refused to let her harvests grow out of the sadness of missing her daughter. As the queen of the dead, Persephone is said to be a very formidable and beautiful queen who can be both vengeful and merciful depending on her mood.